May 14, 2008

My predictions are occasionally or even usually wrong, but that is ok. Because, you see, sometimes they are dead on.

Reading the recent reports detailing how thoroughly Republicans are going to get their asses handed to them this fall (such as losing seats in Louisiana and Mississippi for pete's sake, and the unbelievably high numbers of dissatisfied Americans overall, according to polls) it isn't even a prediction that the Dems are going to sweep things in the Congressional elections, it is a certainty.

(Not that this matters. The Democratic leadership is utterly useless and incapable of changing gears in the country or doing anything other than gobbling down the load President Bush deigns to shower then with occasionally).

But there will be a lot of pleasure in seeing Republicans shitbags routed out of government like rats.

My prediction is that ostensible President-for-Life Obama will lose the fall election even as the Democrats gain massive control over the Congress. The little inklings of America's deep prejudice that is slowly dawning on the hemp-jeans-wearing volunteers busy running Obama's campaign (and the inexplicable cluelessness of the chattering classes in their rush to annoit Obama as Risen Salavation) will come home to roost (to quote Re. Wright).

The analogy would be the anti-gay marriage amendments. The Democrats won big in 2006 but in the same places those amendments passed. Most commentators, as I recall, theorized that the latter enabled the former. Or something like that.

My guess is that the "for the first time in my life I am proud of America" constituency were all bewildered when Americans voted this way, but that perhaps they should steel themselves for more of the same.

In the presidential election people will be able to vote their dissatisfaction and still reject Obama either because of a legitimate sense that he is not qualified to be president, because they haven't drunk the transcendent kool aid, or, not uncommonly I am sure, because they are just flat out racist.

Perhaps this was the secret plan all along. Get a veto proof Congress but allow a Republican president back into the White House to be splattered by the Giant Shitstorm sure to come from failure in Iraq, recession, energy crisis, and good knows what other massive fuck-ups Bush will leave behind (remember, he has several more months of pooch screwing before exiting).

Only Democrats sitting in campaign buses somewhere smelling their own farts could possibly think Clinton would produce any different result in the fall. She might poll better than Obama among certain elements of the Democratic party in the primaries, but do let's recall that the country properly hates her fucking guts.

How, we might ask, in this perfect storm of a year, a year in which a properly trained border collie could mouth the right phrases (they know two hundred words) and win, can it be explained that the Democratic party has managed to be incapable of fielding a candidate that does not come inbuilt with massive vote-draining, election-losing flaws?

Could it be that this party is utterly useless and should disappear?

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